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How Can Parents Help Facilitate A Childã¢â‚¬â„¢s Learning?

What blazon of motivation does your kid have | What motivates your kid and what does not | How to utilize extrinsic motivation | How to motivate a kid

Here'due south the savage truth about how to motivate kids to study – not all motivations are created equal. Most parenting methods such every bit rules, consequences, and rewards don't work because they create the wrong kind of motivation. Discover out what motivates your child and how to finer motivate them using seven backed-by-enquiry steps.

What Type Of Motivation Does Your Kid Take

Motivation is the reason that underlines a child's behavior.

At that place are two main types of motivation: intrinsic and extrinsic.

  • Intrinsic motivation refers to doing an activity for its inherent enjoyment.
  • Extrinsic motivation refers to doing an activity, not for its inherent enjoyment but instead for a separable outcome.
boy lays on couch watching tv, find out What motivates your child

Although these two types of motivations may result in similar beliefs, in that location are differences betwixt intrinsic and extrinsic motivation in terms of qualities and sustainability of the behavior.

Studies have shown that when people appoint in an activity out of intrinsic motivation, the quality of engagement and the results are both better ​1​ .

In one report at the University of Rochester, researchers asked a group of undergraduate students to read an article then tape their emotions reading it. 1 week later, they tested the students' ability to recall the information. Students who found the article interesting or enjoyable scored better than other students who didn't in recalling and comprehending the information, even after accounting for their differences in exact aptitude. ​ii​

What Motivates Your Child And What Does Not

So, what motivates your child?

When it comes to motivating our kids, many parents use the "carrot and stick" approach, i.east. rules, consequences, rewards, or behavior charts.

Many people find quick success at the outset, but it stops working afterwards a while.

Fifty-fifty worse, sometimes it backfires.

Here is why…

When children are responding to the "carrot and stick", they are acting on extrinsic motivation.

We've already seen that the quality of behavior resulting from the extrinsic drive is non equally skillful equally intrinsic.

On top of that, you have to proceed using the carrot and stick for the desired behavior to continue.

That is simply non sustainable in the long term.

But there is a third reason why this is not an effective style to motivate…

Using carrot and stick really reduces a child's intrinsic motivation, if at that place is whatsoever at the beginning.

Many studies have shown that when a advantage (e.thousand. ice cream or video games) or a controlling factor (eastward.g. penalization or privilege removal) is introduced, a person's intrinsic drive decreases. ​i​

In other words, if your child has some involvement in an action at the beginning, your carrot-and-stick "motivation" actually reduces your child's intrinsic motivation.

A kid has to enjoy an activity to be intrinsically motivated.

External rewards, praises, and punishment will not inspire a child'due south interests to develop intrinsically.

It does the verbal opposite.

Does that hateful that our easily are tied and there is nothing we tin can practise?

Non really. At that place is A LOT we tin exercise to assistance our children succeed.

How To Employ Extrinsic Motivation

If your child is not intrinsically motivated enough, we have to work with their extrinsic motivation.

Fortunately, not all extrinsic motivations are bad.

In that location are four types of extrinsic motivation. They prevarication on a spectrum of autonomy, from the least democratic (externally regulated) to the most democratic (integrated).

Amongst these 4 extrinsic motivations, integrated motivation is the virtually desirable form of motivation.

When people take fully identified and alloyed a cause to themselves, they develop integrated motivation.

And so what does that mean?

That ways a person has examined the cause and found information technology lucifer their own values and needs. They can then internalize a cause and accept self-drive.

Considering integrated motivation has many similar qualities as intrinsic motivation, helping children internalize a behavior is a groovy way to inspire internal motivation.

How To Motivate A Kid To Written report – vii Science-backed Steps

1. Stop trying to motivate (the traditional way)

Your attempts to motivate your kid are about likely doing the exact opposite — demotivating your kid.

To be intrinsically motivated is to bask an activity on its own.

If someone doesn't savor an activity, no amount of pushing, bribing, or threatening can make them start to like it. It will only create a power struggle.

And then the traditional ways to deal with a child'due south lack of motivation — rewarding, praising, nagging, scolding, and punishing — are counterproductive.

Therefore, the best approach is to cease using these external factors to motivate.

2. Help them enjoy instead of controlling

Rewarding, praising, nagging, scolding, and negative consequences are ways to control someone'due south behavior.

Being a controlling parent cannot motivate children intrinsically. Applying pressure or offering an incentive can't make an activeness enjoyable.

Allow your child the liberty to take initiative. Having autonomy is an essential condition for intrinsic or integrated motivation to develop ​3​ .

To assist an unmotivated kid develop the right motivation, aim to inspire, non to control.

Note: Giving children options is only another way to control them. It may piece of work on young children, only not on older kids.

The best approach is to testify them how they tin can savor it in unlike ways.

  • Show children that learning a new skill and mastering it is fun.
  • Create a learning surroundings instead of a doing work situation. We learn to acquire new noesis, non but to complete homework or become a good grade.
  • Pique their curiosity in a new subjects past showing them the different uses of it.
  • Let them choose activities according to the child's interests without pressure.
  • Celebrate success milestones together (simply do not over-praise or praise conditionally).
  • Back up kids by providing constructive feedback, non criticism, that tin raise a sense of competence.
  • When children are stuck at a problem, assist them view information technology as a "challenge they can conquer", not a "difficulty they need to overcome".
  • Exercise not refer to the activeness every bit "children's job".
  • Do not apply a interruption from the activity, such as "No school piece of work", every bit a reward.

3. Help them internalize the importance

Some activities do not lend themselves well to enjoyment. If that'south the case, help your child develop integrated motivation.

Assist them identify why an activity is important and aid them internalize the demand for it.

Children must grasp the significant and worth of doing something to fully internalize information technology.

For case, grooming for soccer tin be hard at times. But practicing is a critical and necessary function of becoming expert at it. Assist your kid understand that if they want meliorate results in soccer, they must practice even though information technology is non always enjoyable.

mother daughter read together with positive and optimistic outlook

4. Aid them decide and let them make up one's mind

Autonomy is crucial in creating intrinsic motivation or integrated motivation. Children have to brand their ain decisions to feel a sense of autonomy, a vital intrinsic motivator ​4​ .

Most people are afraid that if they let their children make their own decisions, kids volition inevitably make the wrong ones and fail.

Falling is an inevitable part of learning to walk. Making wrong decisions is an inevitable and important function of learning to make proficient decisions.

Give children opportunities to practise decision-making. If the activity is not health or safe-related, permit them decide, with your guidance. Let them face the natural effect.

For example, if a child refuses to exercise his homework, fifty-fifty after you explain the importance of it, let him face the consequence in school.

If the activeness is non health or safety-related simply you have a strong desire for your child to do information technology, information technology is important to empathise why.

There are things children must do, such equally going to schoolhouse, which is not negotiable. Just in that location are things just we believe children must exercise, but they actually don't have to.

Children are non meant to live our lives. Merely because we regret non playing the flute when nosotros were kids doesn't mean our children need to fulfill our dreams. Our kids have their own lives and their own dreams to pursue.

5. Find an optimal challenge

One of the best ways to inspire intrinsic motivation is to help kids enjoy feelings of accomplishment.

If an activity is as well easy, a child volition feel bored quickly. Merely if an activity is also hard, a child will feel discouraged or have self-doubt.

An optimal challenge is 1 that is slightly more than hard than what a child has already mastered, just is even so doable through practice and some hard piece of work.

It is also important to assistance children gain a growth mindset.

Children develop a growth mindset when they believe that talent is not fixed, but malleable. Skills and mastery tin amend through practice and hard work.

Let them know that the procedure of practicing and working through problems is what matters. Help and encourage them to practice.

When they finally master a new skill, that sense of competence will generate positive energy and become a meaning internal motivator, setting their path to success.

teacher talks to kids around the table, showing how to motivate your child

Even if a child does non like an activity, they may appoint in information technology if others they feel connected to value it.

Science tells us that a sense of belonging and relatedness can promote internalization ​five​ . The emotional and personal bonds we course with others are swell motivators.

If a kid feels connected to someone who values a cause, they are more likely to internalize that value.

The importance of relatedness has been extensively studied in education due to its significance in students' operation. In the classroom, when students feel respected and cared for by the instructor, they are more motivated to larn. ​vi​

Parents play an of import function in motivating kids. When y'all have bonded with your child, they are much more likely to listen to you, prefer your values, and get motivated if it is something that is important to you lot.

So how do you lot bail effectively with your child?

Studies prove that parents who prefer an administrative parenting style bond with their children more. These are parents are warm and responsive to their children's needs. They accept high standards and fix limits for their kids.

Psychologists find that authoritative parents create an autonomy-supportive surround that tin increase their children'due south self-regulation and motivation in classrooms. ​seven​

An autonomy-supportive environment is 1 in which parents value autonomy in their children. They encourage kids to cull and participate in solving issues. The home climate is democratic rather than autocratic.

7. Become involved

Another style to promote relatedness is to get involved in the activity. Having the whole family participate shows how much they value information technology.

I of the virtually reliable predictors of children's school performance is the level of parental interest in their kids' learning process. ​eight,ix​

For instance, in sports, you can jitney or spotter their games. During the school twelvemonth, y'all can volunteer in the class. Get involved in their learning activities such as reading. Have a designated family reading time every night and you can bond at the same time.

Final thoughts on what motivates your child

Positive reinforcement is not ever bad. Sometimes, we just desire to requite our young kids something to celebrate accomplishments. The of import thing is not using it as a contingency, i.east. if you do this, then you get this. Any extrinsic rewards should be unexpected, offered simply after the activity finishes, and not routinely given (because then your child will outset to await them). You lot can also offering praise, positive feedback, or improvement suggestions in identify of tangible rewards. All of these can motivate your child for future tasks.

Need Assist Motivating Kids?

If you are looking for additional tips and an actual footstep-by-step plan, this online course How To Motivate Kids is a slap-up place to kickoff.

Information technology gives you the steps you lot need to identify motivation problems in your kid and the strategy you lot tin apply to aid your child build cocky-motivation and become passionate about learning.

Once you know this science-based strategy, motivating your child becomes piece of cake and stress-free.


References

  1. 1.

    Scott Rigby C, Deci EL, Patrick BC, Ryan RM. Across the intrinsic-extrinsic dichotomy: Self-determination in motivation and learning. Motiv Emot. 1992;16(3):165-185. doi:10.1007/bf00991650

  2. 2.

    Ryan RM, Connell JP, Plant RW. Emotions in nondirected text learning. Learning and Individual Differences. Published online Jan 1990:i-17. doi:x.1016/1041-6080(ninety)90014-8

  3. iii.

    Grolnick WS, Ryan RM. Autonomy in children'due south learning: An experimental and individual divergence investigation. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. 1987;52(5):890-898. doi:ten.1037/0022-3514.52.v.890

  4. four.

    Zuckerman Yard, Porac J, Lathin D, Deci EL. On the Importance of Self-Determination for Intrinsically-Motivated Behavior. Pers Soc Psychol Bull. 1978;four(3):443-446. doi:x.1177/014616727800400317

  5. five.

    Ryan R, Deci Due east. Intrinsic and Extrinsic Motivations: Classic Definitions and New Directions. Contemp Educ Psychol. 2000;25(1):54-67. https://world wide web.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/10620381

  6. half-dozen.

    Ryan RM, Powelson CL. Autonomy and Relatedness every bit Fundamental to Motivation and Education. The Journal of Experimental Education. 1991;sixty(1):49-66. doi:10.1080/00220973.1991.10806579

  7. vii.

    Grolnick WS, Ryan RM. Parent styles associated with children's self-regulation and competence in school. Journal of Educational Psychology. Published online 1989:143-154. doi:ten.1037/0022-0663.81.two.143

  8. 8.

    Griffith J. Relation of Parental Involvement, Empowerment, and School Traits to Student Academic Performance. The Journal of Educational Research. Published online September 1996:33-41. doi:10.1080/00220671.1996.9944441

  9. 9.

    Jeynes WH. The Relationship Between Parental Involvement and Urban Secondary Schoolhouse Student Academic Accomplishment. Urban Education. Published online January 2007:82-110. doi:x.1177/0042085906293818

Source: https://www.parentingforbrain.com/what-motivates-your-child/

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